A New Blog for a New Age

A month ago I turned 70. I realize that many people enter a period of decline at this age. Even if I do well, many of my friends will not. Everything I read about the aging process is doom and gloom, painting the worst possible scenarios that older people must endure. I do not see an established vehicle for individuals to openly discuss what it is like to move through the final decades of life. I imagine that, just like any time period, there are positives and negatives.

I have many thoughts about this stage of being, yet think it unwise to talk too much about the subject to my friends and relatives. I am convinced those are not conversations they want to hear over and over again. My solution has been to start a blog about aging after 70. The blog has been up and running since just before my birthday.

The idea for the blog came to me after reading the book Americanah, by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Americanah is about a Nigerian who comes to the United States. Among other things, she writes an anonymous blog about the interactions of our African-American population with Caucasians—all from a Nigerian’s point-of-view. There are two things I liked about the character’s blog: the anonymity and the fact that she was brutally honest about her observations.

My new blog is also anonymous. I have told those who are close to me that the blog is up and running, but I have told no one how to find it. While they know the general subject manner, they do not know the title or the platform I am using. The blog is written under a pseudonym, which is quite liberating. I am free to chronicle my aging experience without worrying about embarrassing others or myself. I also want to be brutally honest in a way that would not be comfortable if people knew I was the author. I have not been able to find anything else on the Internet with the approach I have chosen. My intent is to describe what it’s like to age physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Friends have asked, “Why not just journal in private?” I want to give others the opportunity to see what goes through the head of at least one aging individual. I am also hoping that, in time, the blog will start a discussion amongst people, validate their own feelings and provide better understanding for those who are younger.

I wonder if you’ll be able to find my blog with the hints I have provided. Of course, if you do, I will deny that I am the author.

Organizing My Notes

I literally have boxes of notes related to my writing. These include old journals, slips of paper with ideas for themes, titles, characters, and story lines, along with pages of writing I have done for parts of a memoir and snippets of already written stories to weave into a novel. I am in the process of organizing all of this material into file folders, hoping that by doing so, I can figure out the best way to present the material in written form.

Rereading my old journals is the most difficult part. I used to sit in bed and write with a spiral notebook and pen, just before nodding off. I would allow myself about 15 minutes to do so. Unfortunately (or fortunately), I was never able to adhere to my self-imposed schedule. Usually, I wrote in my journal during difficult periods of my life. The process was a cathartic experience and often helped me to work out problems I was having at the time. Usually the 15 minutes I had allowed would morph into an hour or more. Finally, I had to stop because I wasn’t getting enough sleep. Now, when I read those journal entries, I find that they tear away at my heart. Those were difficult emotional times and I am reliving the experiences through the writing. This often leaves me feeling depressed. That’s the downside. The upside is that I realize it is actually good writing if it is able to upset me so much. I truly captured the feeling at the time. These emotions just might be good enough to insert into a piece of fiction. (I am not honest enough to put them into a memoir, as I don’t want to admit to some of the troubles I encountered.) When writing a novel, I think it would be difficult to evoke real emotion if one is not experiencing it at the time. Having these journal entries could be a real asset when creating a larger work.

One of my biggest writing problems is the quantity of ideas I have and material I have already created. I can’t seem to get my arms around it to put it into a meaningful form. I would love to hear how others have tackled the same problem.

I have a real need to write. Each morning I start by sending emails to friends and relatives. It’s a routine, much like brushing my teeth. The day is not complete without it. I start, meaning to just write a line or two, soon finding that I’ve written a much longer letter than intended. I would like to be able to take my love of writing and actually create a larger, more singular product.

Writer’s block is not my problem. Creating something meaningful with my writing is a problem. I am so inspired by the workshops that I attend at Lighthouse Writer’s Workshop, yet I have not found one workshop that addresses my problem. I would appreciate some help.

For now, I will continue organizing my notes, hoping that it will eventually all fall into place.